Today is Mother's Day. The day women with kids reflect. The day women without kids either mourn or rejoice. The day kids reflect, too, I suppose.
Today, I rejoice. I rejoice at being a mother. I have 5 kids. Five wonderful kids. Now, most mothers think their kids are wonderful. Mine really are. They are creative, loving, compassionate, thoughtful, smart, responsible, forward thinking people. And, they love each other. But, maybe even better...they LIKE each other. They like being with each other. Hanging out. Talking. Gossiping. Chatting it up. Laughing. That makes my mother-cup full to overflowing.
I spend a fair amount of time thinking about "the big picture". The purpose and meaning of life and all. MY life, specifically, often. A lot of "whys" will be answered one day. But, for the time being I just have to accept things as they are and learn from the past to either continue successes or discontinue failures. When I think about my roots and the circumstances that combined to bring me to my present, I have a lot of curiosities. 'How might things have been different IF..." "Why did..."? "Why didn't..."? "How in the world..."? You get the idea. I don't suppose I'm much different in that than most people. Or maybe I'm just weird.
My own mother...Elizabeth Joyce Weir Prudhomme Voorhies...if graded on her life might not score very high in some people's book. Hard childhood. Crappy teen aged years. Tough adult life. Alcoholism. Abuse. Early death (50). Yes, I have outlived my mother, which is weird. I always knew she died young, but it was only when I reached her age that I realized just HOW young it really was. But, she had an ability to love. Some people might have lost that, but she never did. She had a handicapped brother that she loved fiercely. She loved my brother and me. I've said it before, but when I was sick she, and only she, could make me feel better. I might have still been fevered or achy but I was COMFORTED. NURTURED. LOVED.
All I had was her example on how to learn to be a mom. Some of her examples weren't all that great, to be honest. But, many were. I've tried to throw out the bad and keep only the good. I've not succeeded, always. But, my kids still speak to me, they love me, they support me, they care about me. So, today, I rejoice. I rejoice that for whatever reason, I got the kids to mother that I did. I love them in ways I can't even express. They completely enrich my life.
It is a happy Mother's Day for me, thanks to them (and Howard, of course)! I couldn't have been a mom without him :) I love you all. And a very Happy Mother's Day to Sarah, Erin & Stacy.