Michael

Thoughts about my youngest son...

I think a lot of people think that I obsess about Michael and think/talk about him ALL the time. Well, I don't. Really. There are days that outside of praying about/for him, I don't think about him more than a few times. Maybe that's a bad thing, but it's the truth. But, when I do think of him, I have very tender thoughts.

Maybe it's the timing of the mission. He's been out just about 13 months. Long enough to be used to him being gone, but also long enough to really miss him.

When I read his emails, sometimes I'm a bit frustrated because there's not as much "personal" info (feelings, thoughts, etc.) as I would like, but then, I realize it's MICHAEL who's writing. Not the emoter in the fam. So, I'm grateful that he writes as faithfully as he does. I try to imagine him in his daily routine. What is he wearing when he sleeps and gets up in the morning. What is he eating for breakfast? Where is he reading in his scriptures. Does he have a favorite scripture? Do he and his companion get into good Gospel discussions over the scriptures they've read or a lesson they taught or attended on Sunday? Where is he going today? How many doors is he knocking on and are people at least kind, if not receptive? Does he find humor in the situations? Knowing Michael I bet he does! What is he eating for lunch? IS he eating lunch? Did he get mail today and did it make his day because he had a really discouraging one? Is he teaching a lesson tonight? What did he get for dinner? Is he having to eat things he hates? Is he getting things he likes? Does he get homesick?(I hope not). What do the other missionaries think of him? Does he know how proud we are of him and how often we think of him? And so it goes. Now, I don't think all those thoughts every single day. But, I've thought all of them at some time or another.

It's just weird to think of what he'll be like when he comes home. He left a young man. He'll return a MAN. Full of confidence and NOT needing me to tell him what to do. But, I probably will, about some things. After all, it would be a waste to not share some of the wisdom I've accrued, right?! Just kidding. I dont' think he'll find us (the ones he left behind) changed as much as we'll find him changed. Of course the neices and nephews will have grown 2 years and that will be obvious. But other changes, from other people, not so much.

I've dreamed of him a few times and that seems to put me in the "thinking of him more" mode. It's weird, what can I say?

This isn't a profound post or earth shattering in any way. Just some random thoughts about my boy/man that I miss. A lot. Just like I would miss any of my kids who I hadn't seen in 13 months.

Heroes

At Time Out for Women, a question that was asked of the presenters was, "Who Is Your Hero? They all had interesting comments, some said family members, others people from history. That got me to thinking about who my heroes are (is). Sheila Doherty is a hero to me. She is an amazing woman. Fun, full of energy, so totally devoted to the Gosepel of Jesus Christ, GREAT mom and grandmother. Missionary. She, to me, has always been so totally insightful to so many things. It's like she's always where I want to be. She's about 10 or 12 years older than me, so maybe that's why. I consider her the big sister I never had.

Stephanie Waite is a woman I've never met. But, I've read her blog on a regular basis. She's heroic in how she's handling the drowning death of her baby girl, Camille. She wouldn't think she's heroic. But, her willingness to share her experience with the world is.

So, who are your heroes? I'd like to know.

Time Out!

I went to Time Out For Women, today. It was originally scheduled to be held in February, but when Pres. Hinckley died, it was postponed. I went two years ago. It was good, but a bit cheesy. OK, really cheesy. I might have skipped this year, except for the fact that my ALL TIME FAV Gospel music singer, Hilary Weeks was performing. So, I went. Was not disappointed.

Hilary was pretty much the main event. I thought that she'd sing a song, maybe two, three if we were really lucky and then she'd be off. But, no, she was on, off, on, off, on, off...singing every time. Pretty great. She has a new CD out, which I purchased on the spot and she sang a few songs and I was not disappointed. She sings what's in my heart, so often. I'll stop, but I think it's safe to say there's probably not a bigger Hilary Weeks fan than me. The other speakers were pretty good and one in particular, was FUNNY. I saw some people from our old ward and visited with them. It was nice.

Work has been pretty busy, busy. I won't go into it but will just say that it appears that the increased cost of gasoline is being reflected in more students riding the busses. And, we didn't get more busses. So...lots of work for yours truly.

Howard's 60th birthday was Thursday. From what he said, he had a pretty good day. We took all our kids/spouses/girlfriend to dinner at Marie Callendars. We had the little private room and it was great. Great company, great conversation, lots of laughs and good times. I really wanted to throw a big 6-0 party for him, but he threatend mutiny if there was one, or if he even caught wind of one, so I passed. The man just doesn't appreciate a good surprise party!

My brother was without power for 5 days in Louisville this week. Hurricane Ike blew through with high winds for several hours and lots and lots of big, old, trees blew down and took power lines with them. The power company actually ran out of poles replacing all of the ones that were downed and broken. The governor had to call back the National Guard troops that had been sent to Texas to help with the clean up there. But, they finally got power back yesterday.

That's about it from my super exciting, entertaining, thrilling, life for now.

Hmm. Really?

Turns out I have Obstructive Sleep Apnea. I knew there was a possiblility because I scored really high on the symptoms test. And, I'm really tired a lot of the time. But, when I had the sleep study and they didn't have to come in with the C-Pap machine, I took that as a good sign. But, today, the EN&T Dr. told me I have mild-moderate apnea. I had 10 episodes/hour of not breathing for 20 seconds. And, I had one session of v-e-r-y s-l-o-w breathing that lasted 92 seconds. And, I have a fairly deviated septum which has my right side of my sinuses a bit messed up. I have cool CT scan pictures to show it. This means that while I don't have chronic sinus infections, because of the messed up anatomy, it increases the opportunities for repeated accute sinus infections. Go! Dr. Wahab, because that's what she said. Actually, she said, "I want you to see a specialist to follow up with some tests to see if you have chronic infection that just NEVER clears up or not". IF I want to have surgery to correct it, it will help my breathing and possibly help the apnea, but it's not pressing. It would be outpatient surgery and supposedly not all that painful (which anyone that knows me, knows that's huge, to me). The other option is to have surgery to REDUCE THE SIZE OF MY TONGUE and remove my uvula and take out some soft tissue in my throat. Uh, no thanks! Even the dr. doesn't want to do that.
But, for now, I'll have to start with the C-Pap.

So, the next step is go BACK for another sleep study and get to wear a mask of some sort and have them figure out how high the pressure needs to be to reach optimal results. Yippee. I can hardly wait. But, this time, I WON'T have to try to sleep on my back, which I never do anyway, and was a great waste of time and sleep. After the 2nd sleep study, I'll get a C-Pap machine. Then, after 3 months, we'll re-evaluate.